The Blog and Tour Schedule of Carlos Celdran. A man who is trying to change the way you look at Manila - one step at a time. Telephone: (02)4844945 Text/Cell:(0920)9092021 or Email: celdrantours@hotmail.com

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

OMG.

MANILA BY FIRE AND SWARD..
While vanity-googling, yes - we all google our own names - don't pretend like you don't, I found this blog called "Chronicles of Ishna Vera" run by Arlo, one of the guys who worked on the Intramuros special I did with Susan Calo-Medina for the TV show Traveltime. And OMG. It was the most amazing translation of my tour ever done in full Swardspeak (gayspeak). Precious. Difficult to understand, but precious nevertheless. And I thought due to my years of working with advertising/artsy/media folk and having a couturier as my flatmate, I would be fluent in Sward. I realize now, I know nothing.

Excerpts from Blog:
"Pohtah talagang dat Miguel Lopez de Legaspi ha... after niyang getlagin ang manila bay property of the moro-muslim Ache-Soliman-Lakandula group, super tayo siya ng fort named after the saint Santiago. Religious? Wit! Pasaway kamo... dahil ang full namesung pala ng Santiago na yan ay Santiago na Chumuchugi ng Moro. Ayan may picture pa ng Santiago while making chuginess. (above)."

My rough translation:
"That cheeky Miguel Lopez de Legazpi. After taking the land of Sultan Soliman, he built a fort on top of it and named it Fort Santiago (St. James). Sounds innocuously religious no? But upon closer analysis, there is a darker side, the fort was named after Saint James, the Slayer of Moors. And there you see him, St. James in the act of slaying Moors (see photo above.)"

An Especially Great Part of the Entry:
"He's not tall but fair, has a rotund tummy and large shoes na pointing out ward.. in other worlds mukha siyang peras na ipinatong sa paa ni Ronald Mcdonald... and i mean it in a nice way."

Rough Translation:
"He's not tall but fair, has a rotund tummy and large shoes na pointing outward.. in other words, he looks like a pear balancing atop Ronald McDonald's feet. And I mean it in a nice way."

The rest of the blog was in really Elizabethan high sward and I got a nosebleed.

Is there a kind gay out there somewhere who could post a better translation of the entry in my comments box? Apparently, Babelfish doesn't do Sward just yet.

Read the post here. Get to Arlo's blog here.

Labels:

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Merry Christmas. Happy Hannukah. Happy Kwanzaa. And all that jazz.

Labels:

Saturday, December 15, 2007

YEAH. YEAH. YEAH.

Cool. I finally found the Nescafe ad online. Ricci Chan, the TV host/singer/celebrity who played Angel in the Philippine production of Rent posted it on his YouTube account (he sang the jingle). I hope he doesn't mind I posted the TVC on my blog.

I noticed something strange about the ad, who the hell am I? Why do I look like I should be their dad? And during the shoot, I had to shave my moustache. Apparently, I looked too much like a drug dealer.

Labels:

Thursday, December 13, 2007

BRAVO! BRAVO! BRAVO!

RENOVATION AND RESTORATION REDUX
Look at this bit of good news I found in The Inquirer. So glad to hear that one of my favorite buildings in Manila, The Beaux Arts Luneta Hotel is well on its way to being restored to its former glory. In an article online, Beaumont Properties, the new owners of this 87-year old structure who bought it from the Panlilio family, said that they aim to "restore it, not demolish it." Among their ambitious plans are to strengthen the structure by constructing an independent steel frame within the building itself so that the facade would not be harmed (steel framing pictured below) and restoring all the detailing. The project also seems to have the approval of both the National Historical Institute and the Heritage Conservation Society. Very cool. And I hear Beaumont is a very reliable, but low-key company who have done restoration and renovation in both Singapore and The United Kingdom so this definitely won't be a half-assed development. The steel columns you see below ain't cheap. And their three year timeline definitely shows this is going to be a labor of love.

And contrary to earlier whispers in the blogosphere, the building is NOT going to be a casino. It will be a boutique hotel. Apparently of the highest quality (real marble and stuff) and of levels of luxury deserving of such a structure. Can't wait to check in.

And Thanks Aidan for the review of my Imelda tour on your blog.

Hope to see you guys out there on tomorrow's Imelda tour, Dec. 14 at two pm. Meet at the CCP Little Theater Lobby.

Labels:

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

AND NOW A MESSAGE FROM OUR SPONSOR..

Good thing I like poker. If not I don't think I would have let flagrant sponsorship like this pass through my grubby ol' fingers.

Ahem... Apparently PokerStars is looking for the next Filipino millionaire on the PokerStars Sunday Million Tourney.

Qualify for free on Pokerstars.NET, where they have daily freerolls (free tournaments) exclusive to Filipinos starting December 3, 2007 (as in: NOW) from Monday to Friday at 7:00 pm. The Top 5 winners from each day of the week advances to a 25-player Saturday Tourney. The winner of the Saturday Tourney then moves on to the Sunday Million Tourney on PokerStars.com. Play with the pros and you just might win some serious serious bread.

More details at Pokerstars.net!

Labels: ,

WALA LANG...

My apologies, but I'm just going make a celebrity post just because I'm cheap and showbiz like that. How cool is it that Amazing Race contestants Rovilson Fernandez (Team Philippines with Marc Nelson) and the pretty Vanessa Chong (Team Malaysia with her sister Pamela) both took time out from their shooting schedule to attend my tour last Saturday morning. Both were very nice and courteous. (They made the mistake of arriving at the tour one day ahead of the open tour and crashed the tour of one of my favorite clients, Miss Lani Ablaza - who was gracious enough to allow them to join us.) But most of all they were discreet, no mention was made of Amazing Race I'm under the impression that they are still in the race. Or are they? And not to get all Cher Horowitz here but don't they look like they should be dating?

Ambaduyko.

Oh. And props out to Vanessa for eating balut. That's the spirit.

Amazing Race Asia website and forum here:

AND BIGGER PROPS TO BRYANBOY for helping uplift our battered national image by recommending Boracay as the holiday destination of choice for the international American traveller. Read the PsychoPEDIA article here:

Labels: ,

Saturday, December 01, 2007

I'M STILL P***** OFF...

I HATED THE ABS-CBN TRILLANES COVERAGE. No secret about that. I felt their presence aggravated the Trillanes crisis/travesty and that their reactions about being taken into custody were overblown. But that's just me.

How about you? What did you think of the way ABS-CBN News handled themselves and the Band of Baboons a couple days ago? Log onto my box at Yahoo Answers and tell me what's on your mind. Now, don't mince words. Gimme a good answer and I'll give you points too.

But if you are too lazy, just fill my comments box with your love instead.


Oh. And while you are at it, please post this on your blog. Print it out into a sticker or flyer and spread it around just so that Senor Trillanes and all those who surrounded him know exactly what we really think of them. Thanks Philippine Comedian.

Bryanboy for President in 2010! Woo-hoo.