Friday, April 10, 2009

RUN FOR THE HILLS...

THE HELIUM CLUB
Oh. My god. I'm not sure what I just saw and I'll probably hate myself for posting about it on my blog because it will only confirm it's existence - but have you checked out, "The Helium Club?" Wild. This show packs in some of the most amazing faces, fashion, music, and grammar produced by this country of 7,107 islands in a long long while. And by amazing, I mean not amazing at all. Supposedly the world's first online reality series (questionable), The Helium Club attempts to be a peek into the rarefied lives of Manila's five most fabulous faces currently on the scene (Tara, JV, Bianca, Kristine, and Martin). And although it tries to be the Filipino answer to "The Hills", it comes across instead as the surreal jologs love child of... of ... God, I have no idea. This baby is in a class of it's own.

Log onto their five minute trailer on facebook and check out how many levels of wrong this show descends. After opening up with the cryptic phrase, "Live side by side the excess of our society's newest youth powerhouse", it's all downhill. I mean, really, what does "youth powerhouse" mean? It doesn't make sense. Their copywriter should be fined for assault and battery on the English language, while the entire cast could be flogged for the improper use of the words "Prada", "Dude", "Hell, yeah" and "Rustan's". But even then, I would finish the trailer just to catch soon-to-be-classic phrases like: "Cats are better than men", "You snooped on my planner" and  "It just comes natural." Finally, it's all wrapped up with a photoshoot with BryanBoy (Does he even know he is in there? Yikes). I mean, what's going on? Is this a joke? It must be a parody of Manila's "high society" because endless shots of chubby Filipinos chowing down on North Park as they twang in worsh worsh just isn't ghetto fabulous, if you know what I mean.

So can someone please clue me in? If this is satire, then it's fricking brilliant! No director could ever come up with comedy so spot on that it begged to be mocked. But if it's not. Then, Wow. No comment.