Wednesday, December 26, 2007


While vanity-googling, yes - we all google our own names - don't pretend like you don't, I found this blog called "Chronicles of Ishna Vera" run by Arlo, one of the guys who worked on the Intramuros special I did with Susan Calo-Medina for the TV show Traveltime. And OMG. It was the most amazing translation of my tour ever done in full Swardspeak (gayspeak). Precious. Difficult to understand, but precious nevertheless. And I thought due to my years of working with advertising/artsy/media folk and having a couturier as my flatmate, I would be fluent in Sward. I realize now, I know nothing.

Excerpts from Blog:
"Pohtah talagang dat Miguel Lopez de Legaspi ha... after niyang getlagin ang manila bay property of the moro-muslim Ache-Soliman-Lakandula group, super tayo siya ng fort named after the saint Santiago. Religious? Wit! Pasaway kamo... dahil ang full namesung pala ng Santiago na yan ay Santiago na Chumuchugi ng Moro. Ayan may picture pa ng Santiago while making chuginess. (above)."

My rough translation:
"That cheeky Miguel Lopez de Legazpi. After taking the land of Sultan Soliman, he built a fort on top of it and named it Fort Santiago (St. James). Sounds innocuously religious no? But upon closer analysis, there is a darker side, the fort was named after Saint James, the Slayer of Moors. And there you see him, St. James in the act of slaying Moors (see photo above.)"

An Especially Great Part of the Entry:
"He's not tall but fair, has a rotund tummy and large shoes na pointing out ward.. in other worlds mukha siyang peras na ipinatong sa paa ni Ronald Mcdonald... and i mean it in a nice way."

Rough Translation:
"He's not tall but fair, has a rotund tummy and large shoes na pointing outward.. in other words, he looks like a pear balancing atop Ronald McDonald's feet. And I mean it in a nice way."

The rest of the blog was in really Elizabethan high sward and I got a nosebleed.

Is there a kind gay out there somewhere who could post a better translation of the entry in my comments box? Apparently, Babelfish doesn't do Sward just yet.

Read the post here. Get to Arlo's blog here.